Review #100: The Ramones - Rocket to Russia (1977)

ROCKET TO RUSSIA

Year: 1977

Genre: Punk Rock
Sub-Genres: Pop-Punk
Label: Sire Records
Tracks: 14
Length: 31 Minutes (Medium-Length)
Style: Fun/Happy/Love
My Rating: 6/8

"Rocket to Russia" was the Ramones' third album. By the time this record came out in 1977, punk was at an all-time high. There were many, many punks and punk rock bands in both the U.S.A. and England, and it was becoming visible to the point that there was actually a large moral panic amongst the more conformist segments of the population and the police, who believed that punks were only no good and punks during this period were often beaten, arrested, and generally abused for no reason other than their clothes or the music they played. It was a hard time, but they lived for the music. This album is similar in style to the two albums before it, and it's the last Ramones studio record to feature Tommy Ramone, the original drummer (and the only still-living member of the original line-up!).

1. Cretin Hop
Well, it's a song about some dancing "cretins". Apparently a Cretin in the literal sense of the word is a person with a severe stunted growth disorder, often appearing to look very similar to a troll doll. Seriously. So if the Ramones were actually singing about a bunch of Cretins dancing around and stuff, then that's pretty cool. Anyways, the song is pretty good, but it's not the best of the bunch.

2. Rockaway Beach
Once again, speaking in real-life terms, Rockaway Beach is an actual beach in New York. The song was probably named after this beach. The song sounds very influenced by the Beach Boys or something like that. The Ramones sing about not wanting to hang out on the street because it's too hot and because "they blast out disco on the radio".

3. Here Today, Gone Tommorrow
They say that this is the first song that Joey Ramone wrote all by himself. It's a slower love song. Probably something you n' your fellow Ramones-lovin' lover could listen to on the radio (instead of blasting out disco) and kiss passionately to as the sun sets out on Rockaway Beach. Well, actually, maybe not, since it actually seems like it's supposed to be a song about breaking up. Like, you could listen to it, and then just turn off the radio when he starts talking about breaking up. But that's probably a bad idea. Heh-heh. I could swear a heard a phaser or something at one point in the song. Someone had to pay the price. It's a nice, sort of sad-but-also-happy riff.

4. Locket Love
It almost sounds like there's a little bit of acoustic guitar here. Either that or the distortion just isn't as high, here. I like the instrumental riffs inbetween the verses more than the verse riffs to be honest. Still, good, though. Lyrically, it's another stupid love song. It's good, though.

5. I Don't Care
The riff here is really bad-ass. Lyrically, it's very simple: "I don't care". Not caring. Dee-Dee provides strange falsetto backing vocals.

6. Sheena is a Punk Rocker
First we knew that Judy is a Punk, then Suzy is a Headbanger. Now, meet Sheena. She iz a punk rocker. This is a fun, fast, catchy song. I like the vocal melody during the chorus section.

7. We're a Happy Family
Definitely my favorite Ramones song I've ever heard. This song is about Johnny Ramone's dysfunctional family life during childhood, though the lyrics give a more humorous take on it all. The riff is awesome, the vocals are awesome, they all fit really well together, actually giving you that "happy family" feeling of total harmony with the music. A bunch of random sound clips start fading in as the sound slowly fades out, with random radio clippets and snippets of the band arguing with eachother playing until the song ends. End of Side 1.

8. Teenage Lobotomy
The lyrics are kind of nonsensical (unless there's something I don't know) in this one. It's pretty good.

9. Do You Wanna Dance
A cover of a 1958 pop song by Bobby Freeman translated into pop-punk song in which Joey asks some unnamed girl if she wants to dance. More Beach Boys-style "oooh, ooooh"s for background vocals. Probably 'cause the Beach Boys ALSO covered this song.

10. I Wanna Be Well
A slower song about being a burnout who gets high all the time. However, as already suggested by the happy melody, the Ramones sing, "my future's bleak -- ain't it neat??"... could be sarcasm, though. Little did this kid know he would eventually grow up to be a Ramone and be in a band called the Ramones which was really cool n' stuff.

11. I Can't Give You Anything
More acoustic guitar here -- I just love the sound of an acoustic guitar combined with the fury of an electric one, y'know. This song's about a girl who likes a boy, but doesn't realize that he's poor and can't buy anything for her.

12. Ramona
Yet another woman loved by the Ramones: meet RAMONA! A girl that always comes over to hang out with the Ramones and listen to loud music with them. Ramona was probably, like, some girl who was going to be the fifth female Ramone, but she didn't make the cut because she didn't play any instruments. And get this -- she's a spy for the B.B.I.!

13. Surfin' Bird
A cover of the classic rock song by the Trashmen (who could be considered one of the progenitors of punk rock themselves). However, the Ramones version takes the cake. It's about a fucking surfin' bird! YEAH! Don't tell me you haven't heard about the bird... what? You have? OH YIPPETY-YAY! Anyways, it's a very fun, cool song. Joey even goes on to imitate the little "Poppa-Oom-Mow-Mow" part halfways through the song.

14. Why is it Always This Way?
The riff is very upbeat and happy (I swear, the Ramones couldn't write a sad song), but the lyrics are very dark... it's about a girl who Joey knew, who committed suicide by drinking poison. The song just sorta fades out during the second chorus. Well, that's the end.

So, that's "Rocket to Russia". The actual album itself has a lot of neat cartoons in and on it, including, well, a guy riding a rocket to Russia! Coincidence or incidence? Who knows, man. As you already probably heard, after this one, Tommy was kicked out of the band and replaced by a new drummer named Marky Ramone -- both are still alive and well. This album takes a slight deviation from the straight-forward punk sound they pioneered, and shows their great interest in pop music, surf-rock, and garage rock. It's a pretty neat album, and if you like the Ramones or punk in general, then what are ya waiting for? Go listen to it.

Top 3 Favorites:
1. We're a Happy Family
2. Surfin' Bird
3. Locket Love

Review #44: The Ramones - Ramones (1976)

RAMONES

Year: 1976
Genre: Punk Rock
Label: Sire Records
Tracks: 14
Length: 29 Minutes (Medium-Length)
Style: Happy/Funny/Weird
My Rating: 7/8

The earliest punk rock bands actually formed throughout the late '60s and the early '70s in New York. Examples of this are the Patti Smith Group, the Stooges, and the Velvet Underground. However, if described in a more popular point-of-view, the Ramones, as said by many, were the first punk rock band. Formed in 1974 in New York, they were America's answer to an age of boring, overcomplicated, pretentious rock n' roll. While originally intending to simply in a sense recreate the old fashioned rock music of the '40s and '50s, they ended up giving birth to entire genre called "punk rock". Simple beats. Three-chord riffs. Amateur vocals. At the time was rebellious, challenged social norms, and was universally despised by conformists adults of the previous generation and authority figures. For wearing your hair in a weird style or color with a jacket with buttons, pins, and/or spikes on it, you could be arrested or beaten. Back then, "punk rock" was weird music for weird people; they way it should be in a cooler world. Not long after they formed, other punk bands started forming all over the place as well, such as the Sex Pistols, the Clash, Blondie, the Damned, and the Runaways.

And if the Ramones were the first punk rock band, then this is the first punk rock album. It's called "Ramones". 'Cause that's the name of the band that made it. It's not called "Penises", or "Vaginas", or "Little Pieces of Hair on the Floor". It's called "Ramones". And it should probably stay that way 'er something. All of the songs on here are really simplistic. Like pop-songs, but in a less-stupid way. Or in a more-stupid way. Up to you, really. The songs are repetitive riffs and beats with oddball lyrics about sniffing glue, obsessive fans, Nazis, the Bay of Pigs Invasion, and the Texas Chainsaw Massacre film. Still, unlike their peers and admirers, the Ramones made light of any situation. Where a modern punk band would whine about something, the Ramones would make a cartoonish joke of it. The songs are very catchy.

1. Blitzkrieg Bop
The most famous Ramones song ever. Begins with the riff and beat, and then the classic chant of "Hi-Ho! Let's Go!". A lot of World War II-related lyrics, as common in Ramones songs. The funny thing is that this is my least favorite song on the whole album! Well, it's best to save the best for later, anyways. It's a good song, but let's go and see what's next...

2. Beat on the Brat
NOW we're talkin'! This is like an official badass anthem. The lyrics are simple: "Beat on the Brat, Beat on the Brat, Beat on the Brat, Beat on the Brat With a Baseball Bat!". The verse riff is awesome. The chorus asks the question "What can you do with a brat like that?". The song was supposedly inspired by a time that Joey Ramone saw a mother chasing her child around with a baseball bat. Funny story. Longest song on the record.

3. Judy is a Punk
One thing I never got about this one: the title is "Judy is a Punk", but in the actual lyrics, they say "Jackie is a PUNK, Judy is a RUNT". Maybe those are interchangable terms. Hell, maybe we need some RUNT-Rock. This song was based on two real-life highly-obsessed fans, Jackie and Judy. It was cited as "prophetic", for in the chorus, the line is "Perhaps they'll die, oh yeah..." -- the two did indeed die in a plane crash. Shortest song on the record.

4. I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend
The obligatory love/pop-song. It's a little slower than the last few, and the main line is "Hey little girl, I wanna be your boyfriend". A lot of "ooh-ooh-ooh"s goin' on. Sounds like something fitting for a beach in the evening. The song eventually fades out.

5. Chain Saw
This one's based on the horror film "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (a good movie, I might add!). Begins with a soundclip of an actual chainsaw, until the "wowowow"s and riff and beat break in. They pronounce "massacre" different than me. In Ohio, I say "mass-uh-ker". They say "mass-ah-kree". Maybe they're doing it the right way. Makes more sense, to be honest. Ends with Joey going "Oh No, Oh Yeah, Oh No, Oh Yeah..." as it fades out.

6. Now I Wanna Sniff Some Glue
They say that this one's based off of the phenomena of bored New York kids being left at home and turning to glue-sniffing in order to "have somethin' to do". As for the song itself, I like the instrumental mid-section a lot. This one ends abruptly rather than fading out...

7. I Don't Wanna Go Down to the Basement
This one has a cool riff. It's about a guy not wanting to go down to the basement because "there's something down there". What the hell could it be?? Nice bass.

8. Loudmouth
Hah! "You're a loudmouth, baby. You'd better shut it up. I'm gonna beat you up." That's pretty much the whole song. A compelling argument for shutting up any loudmouth.

9. Havana Affair
My favorite song on the album. Supposedly it's based on the Bay of Pigs Invasion that took place in the 1960s. But the song is pretty catchy, with the chorus line "baby baby made me loco... baby baby made me mambo..."

10. Listen to My Heart
Good use of hand-claps. Seems to be a more serious-sounding song, and it's a love-song at that. The song's protagonist reminds himself to protect himself from pain and "next time, to listen to his heart".

11. 53rd & 3rd
This one is supposedly about Dee-Dee Ramone (the group's bassist) when he was a male prostitute. Dee Dee actually sings in this one; he sings the lines "Then I took out my razor blade,
then I did what God forbade, now the cops are after me, but I proved that I'm no sissy". This song is a little slow.

12. Let's Dance
This is a cover of a song by Jim Lee written in 1962. It's a pretty fun, up-beat, fast song. I can actually hear an organ in the background in one part, but I'm not sure if it's really there or if I'm just hearing things. Or maybe it's a harmonica. I really don't know.

13. I Don't Wanna Walk Around With You
The song seems to be a sort of song about a man who is being chastised by an admirer that he doesn't love back. There are little subtleties in the bassline here that make this one enjoyable. Even a weird one-note solo! Ends with a powerful group yell.

14. Today Your Love, Tommorrow the World
A satirical Nazi love-song. Ends with the repeated chorus, "Today Your Love, Tommorrow the World!".

Well, there you have it. The one that started it all. Well, not really, to be honest. There were more than a few punk rock bands before this. And I'm not obliged to rate this record 8/8. I give it a 7/8. They weren't the first band ever to do this kind of music. I'm not going to lie. I'd rather listen to '80s to mid '90s post-punk, 80's hardcore, or noise-rock. They musically have more to offer than this. But they would have never existed if not for this. The Ramones made punk rock big. They solidified it as a movement. They were different and proud. They made simple music cool again. Fuck, they were even conservatives! As weird as they were, the Ramones virtually found their way into the hearts of just about everyone who loves rock & roll. And something definitely can be said about a band who manages to set off an entire world of music with thousands of followers with thousands of ideologies bound together by one thing only: rock and roll.